Monday, October 08, 2007

Commenting? I guess I should be banned...

I took a break from blogging because it was too stressful on my life. I knew I wouldn't stay away too long --it was only about a week.

I think I need to take another break from blogging, but this time it's due to my inability to express myself in a kind way.

I've always had strong opinions about things. Those who know me personally understand that sometimes I speak before I think. I like to think that I've gotten better at it over the years, but it seems that I'm getting worse. This could be blamed upon genetics (I come from a long line of opinionated women), or hormones, or even personality. But those are just excuses.

The sad part, though, is that I've started writing my comments and opinions only after very careful thought. Sometimes I will mull over an opinion for hours before I write it and post it (comments and posts). But it's not making any difference. If anything, I'm creating more trouble.

I'm only left with the thought that my words are too strong. Or perhaps they really are too self-righteous. (Anonymous is probably thrilled, now.) I try to stand for what is right and true. I don't pussyfoot around. I don't sugarcoat anything. I guess that's the problem.

So, I've decided I need to just leave commenting alone for a while. I'll still post things, because I know my family likes to read about what I've been doing; my mom likes to see picture updates. :) But if I don't comment on your personal or community site for a while, you'll know why.

Some will take this as a cop-out. That I'm a coward. Others will think "Good! She's shutting up!" Even others may see this as rude --"She won't comment on my site, why should I comment on hers?" But even more people (the ones that know me) will think "Oh, geeze. She always does this. Gets offended and freaks out. I wish she'd just chill." (don't think I don't know what you truly think of me. One strength of mine is sensing exactly what a person is feeling and I'm rarely wrong.)
Yeah, maybe they're all right. But I'm thinking that nobody will miss my comments when they're gone. That is the catch about blogging. It's easy to be lost in the anonymous world, and nobody notices when you slowly vanish away. And that's what probably hurts the most.

Thank you to those that care what I think and know that I'm not trying to push my views on anyone. I really appreciate it; probably more than you will ever know.

14 comments:

kanga5 said...

This is kind of a comment in bulk- encompassing your last 3 posts. Let's see if I can make this make any sense...
1- I would miss your comments on my blog. I don't get all that many and I'm thinking that I like the few comments that I do get.
2- I don't often comment on bigger blogs because I've ended up where you are too.
3- Anon comments are pretty fruturating. The internet can be awesome but it's also a place to spread gloom and comments without consequences for some.
4- I'm feeling the challenge of having 4 under 7. It's work! :) I've not yet tried to get #4 to sleep ALL night as she is only 5 weeks- however she came to sleep in our bed with us due to Mastitis and now I fear that she's very comfortable there- or in my arms.
5- I also feel your frustration on the temper thing. Conference and just finishing the Peacegiver have given me new hope! :)
6- I hope you are feeling better. Remember those that truely know you and love you and that are all around you.
7- Have a lovely day!

Cheryl said...

Kanga-
Thank you. You are the best. :)

tamrobot said...

Cheryl,
Just wanted you to know, I like reading your blog AND your comments, wherever I end up reading them. Even if I have a little different opinion, I like hearing what you think, and I would definitely miss it! :)

Also, FWIW I think you should not allow anonymous comments.

Love You!

Jamie J said...

Whoa, I must of missed something! I better go catch up on your posts...FWIW I LOVE your comments too!

brenbot said...

i have to ditto tamrobot's comments. i love reading your blog and your comments.

p.s. people that post under anonymous are lame.

Scott and Laura said...

Cheryl... just so you know, you rock my world! I will always love whatever you have to say. I guess someone must have been having a bad day and took it out on your blog. Feel free to comment on my blog all you want... you could never offend me becuase I know you and I know that's not how you roll. :)
Love you!

Summer said...

In all honesty I've been sad you've been gone because I haven't gotten any comments from you on my blog. But I'm certainly not offended by it, but know that you are missed when you don't comment.
And if you really feel the need to take a break, I hope you have a good one.
I have the same problem with not thinking before I speak. So now I stay away from blogs that usually infuriate me. I'm not going to name any.......okay mostly FMH.
Aaaargh, some of those women make me so mad. But I have stayed away, especially after this last conference session.

Cheryl said...

You guys are seriously awesome. I may have to reconsider my commenting break (and it's only been 8 hours!). :) :)

Summer-
YES!!! Thank you!!! I swear, when I stopped commenting and reading FMH, my life was a lot less contentious --and I felt happier. I'm glad I'm not the only one who can't be over there for long. :)

Rochelleht said...

I have to say that I agree with all the comments. It seems to me that the contention seems to have bled over here from the big group blogs. I honestly have never been there until I clicked your links. I don't think it is you. I think they seem to be the place to breed ill-will.

I would continue to post and comment on people's blogs, but avoid the group ones. At least that appears to me to be what causes angst. Cause I've always very much enjoyed your comments on my blog and your posts on yours. I have never once considered you to be controversial or opinionated. I really think 'anon' is a bitter person. Who has time to worry about other people, anyway?

Cheryl said...

Rochelle-
Sadly, I guess that would be me. :) I seem to care too much of what other people think of me. If I didn't, I don't think I'd have a problem with this! But thank you. You have a very valid point and one that actually made me finally stop reading other community blogs (like the one summer mentioned).

Janelle said...

Anonymous is a crackup! I love people who want to call you out on the carpet, but don't tell you which carpet to meet on. When I write I assume that the people know me and my voice. I have been misread a few times by people who have read too deeply into what I intended to be tongue in cheek or mild venting. Anyways, I love that you share your opinions and are quite willing to talk it out online with the rest of us. Boo-hoo I think I'll be taking my blog private however - I got a crazy link up to mine that I didn't feel good about. I'll send you an invite. -J

Cheryl said...

janelle-
Sounds good! I don't blame you. :)

Cristy said...

I am so sorry that someone has made you feel this way. I am literally angry. I too have stronger opinions now that I am a Mother. I think that is what it is, you just have to protect these little ones and you firmly see what is right. Good things Cheryl

Summer said...

I always appreciate your comments at Nine Moons, even (maybe especially) the occasional few that stir the pot a little bit. You're a good blog citizen. I will notice if you go away for good.

Tom