Friday, May 09, 2014

Normalcy is a Miracle

Sometimes, I need to ramble. This is that day.

Yesterday was a pretty normal day, normal in that I ran errands and mailed things, worked on the RS gifts for Mother's Day, finally made it to the salon to get my hair "did," dealt with tantrums, let the boys have a water fight outside, and again met resistance and frustration at bedtime. Normal. Average. Nothing too big to report, nothing too small. And that, dear reader, is the miracle of late, because I am getting back to routine, back to motivation, back to normal. For a long time, I was not normal, I was devastatingly barely surviving, as the darkness clouded my mind and body. Even the thought that I could take my boys to Costco and Target in one day, remember other people, fulfill my children's requests... well, that was an insurmountable cliff of epic proportions. But today, it is normal again, and I am so grateful! 

Therapy has been moved to twice a month and psychiatry to monthly. Taking chaste tree (herbal supplements) has significantly helped with my menstrual cycle and PMS has been reduced to only a few days, rather than more than a week. This is good news for everyone around me, but even better for myself!  

Onward and upward! 

So, my hair is colored and cut (just caramel highlights, and layers and bangs) and I'm trying to decide if I like it. I think she cut too much off, but I needed to clean it up a bit, so I'm not upset. Plus, hair grows, eh? I love the color, though, and the salon, and my new hair person, Siobhan. I think I'll have to keep her! To be honest, it was hard to go get my hair done, because my hairdresser for the last 12 years had been Sue, my neighbor and friend. Nobody can truly replace her!

Please forgive this photo. I took it quickly after I got home (no makeup, the kids were supposed to be ready for bed because it was so late) so I could show it to Brandon. Yes, I was tired. But the highlights were worth it!

*FHE was geocaching in our neighborhood.

*#2 and #3 participated in our school district's 4th/5th grade track and field day. #2 won the hurdles and #3 won the shot put!

*I found out a good friend is expecting twins this Fall, and considering how difficult it has been to get any of their children here (IVF), this is wonderful news! I'm so excited for them! 
*Having summer birthdays is tough, but luckily Preschool teachers understand, so today, #5 gets to celebrate his un-birthday! He begged me to bring cookies and ice cream and I shall fulfill that request. 
*Brandon has been in Atlanta this week. 

There isn't that much more heartwarming than watching my children take care of each other. When #3 changes #6's diaper, or #4 teaches #5 how to do things, or when #2 bakes cookies with #5 or when #1 does... well, everything (because she does!). I love seeing them serve and love each other. It makes up for all the times they are trying to kill each other. 

And you know, since we moved here, they've been spending a lot more time together. A lot, lot, lot. It's so different here because of where we chose to live (country-ish, with 1-2 acres lots), and so my kids have had to learn to be each other's friends. Everyone lives far apart, and even on our street, there are only 2 or 3 kids to play with. Contrast this to Provo where we had 23 kids within a five house radius (not joking), and it's been a hard adjustment for them! Also, because I'm still learning about the boroughs and townships and the different kinds of things that are available to us, they have not been signed up for anything. No sports, no music lessons (aside from one session of Music Time for #6), no... anything. This means the kids spend their time doing homework, playing outside, making messes, playing video games, watching TV, playing board games, and... chores?

Our neighbor girl told my daughter that she wants to do a documentary on our family because we are so strange. She said she's never seen a family that isn't busy, and we're so... laid back and not busy. I laughed because I feel like we're always busy! We just haven't chosen to fill our lives with outside things, especially since moving here. The only things we have chosen to engage in consist of school and church. And even the school stuff is minimal...

It made me ponder/wonder: Am I hurting my kids by not giving them these things? Or am I doing them a favor? When I look back on my life, I realize that aside from piano lessons, I didn't do anything outside of the home until middle school (aside from a little bit of soccer when I was really young) and even then, they were school-sponsored. In fact, High School is where my talents began to thrive and I don't feel like I missed out on anything simply because I wasn't doing everything by the age of 7.

So, I look at my brilliant kids (they are all thriving academically) and their kindness (they have a lot of friends at school and church and I haven't had any phone calls about them bullying, so that's good) and I have decided that I'm not failing like I thought I was. We do the most important things --the things that will truly build their characters and give them the skills to be good people. Things like scripture study, prayer, church, church activities, service projects, play dates with friends, homework, community events, family outings/trips, FHE, etc. Plus, I am a mother with limited abilities. I do not have the mental capacity to juggle myriads of schedules and patiently wade through practices and performances... at least, not now.

In other news, we finally got the lawn mowed (hired a service because of the size of the lot and our lack of riding lawn mower) and I love the smell of cut grass! Yesterday it was really humid (I've been told to brace myself for the thick blanket of extreme humidity and heat that will come in July) and the grass was cut and the birds were singing and the blossoms blooming and the kids were playing outside and although I was in the midst of making some tick repellent (so important, now), it was just wonderful! I love Spring.

Aaaaaaand that is all for now. 

1 comment:

Mother of the Wild Boys said...

I love that your kids are getting this time to establish closer relationships with each other (and with you) by not being so busy outside of your home. Sibling friendships are the ones that truly last a lifetime (and beyond), what a blessing for them that you've provided time for them to develop.