Wednesday, June 19, 2013

My Personal Revelation Shouldn't Be A Threat To You

Why are people so afraid of my personal revelation?

I recently got into a heated discussion with a woman on FB. It didn't last long, but she was absolutely convinced that because of her own personal experience with childbirth, any woman who chooses to give birth at home would be risking her life and her baby's life. That the choice to home birth was ignorant and wrong.

Let's substitute childbirth with something else, shall we? Let's try...moving to Alaska. Or choosing to vaccinate our children. Perhaps we could throw in homeschooling verses public school verses charter school verses private school.

While we're at it, let's add in nursing in public, choosing to have more than one child, which religion to join, whether or not to eat meat and dairy, how much television children should watch, what age to allow the piercing of ears, and any other decision regarding child-rearing.

For fun, I'll throw in which movies to watch, which books to read, whether or not to learn a musical instrument, or deciding to vacation in Hawaii.

Guess what? There are things that people have to decide for themselves and for their families. It's good to be educated and informed. I champion the men and women who get their heads out of the sand, refuse to just be told, search out the answers for themselves, pray about them, ponder them, pray some more, and then apply them. That is what we are meant to do. That is why we have agency, brains, a spirit, and a heart. That is why God sent the Holy Ghost. So we could know what was the best thing for our families and for ourselves.

So, why are people so afraid of others' choices? Choices that don't matter to anyone else?

I could understand throwing down the hatchet if abuse is involved; if I claimed that letting my toddler play in the street was wise. But that's just obvious, isn't it? I'm not talking about those types of things. I'm talking about all these other choices that are incredibly personal and incredibly... choice-filled. (Does that even make sense?)

Yes, I believe home birth is a great thing. Do I believe it is for everybody? No way. Do I believe women need more education about their birthing options? Absolutely. I would never, ever, ever claim that somebody's educated choice to give birth in a hospital was somehow wrong. Ever. And yet I'm still being told (still! After 15 months!) that my choice to birth at home was crazy, wrong, too risky, selfish, etc. You name it.

I'm tired of it, okay? Why don't we do this: You follow your personal revelation, and I'll follow mine. If my eternal salvation starts to become a question, then you feel free to express your concerns. But until then, let's just respect each other's educated and prayed-about choices.

Rant over.


sariqd said...

Ah... I wish I could just MAKE everyone read Elder Holland's talk about choosing to take offense. But then, I have to talk myself down and say, "Now, now, Sara. Let's not be snarky." It's hard to make people understand or respect another's opinion. That's why there's no single (mortal) being in charge of the world. Sorry you had to deal with that. :/

My Heart Squared said...

Exactly what I've been thinking, too, and posted my thoughts about that this week on my blog!
I suppose I have to remember that when the Lord gives personal revelation, that is exactly what it is - for me or my family. Personal revelation for another may be the same or very different than mine. I also need to remember we are all on the same road back. It does no good to criticize or argue. We are on the same team! Thanks for sharing!