Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Stuff and Why Burning Bridges Should be a Felony

My cousin had a baby boy yesterday! Congrats, Andrea and Danny!
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Today is Bythelbs birthday. Happy Birthday, Bythelbs!
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So I have this new neighbor. Her name is Liz and she rocks. I love it when the new neighbor rocks. It's even better when she is a writer, a young mother, enjoys intelligent conversation, and doesn't run the other way when you admit to her that you're insane.
Yesssssssss.
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Right now, #4 is pushing playing cards down the front of his zip-up footy pajamas. This would explain the toys I find in his clothes all the time.
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How is it that within two days, a perfectly clean minivan can take on the appearance of a trash heap?
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I have learned something profound in my beautiful almost-30 years:
Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever Burn Bridges.
Ever.
Because I guarantee you that you will run into people you thought you would never see again. People who you loved, who you hated, who you were apathetic about. You will see them and if you had burned the bridge, it will be awkward. Or, if you were wise and did not burn the bridge, you will reconnect and end up having a new friendship.
Luckily for me, I have never had to learn this the hard way. I have not burned bridges. At least I don't think I've burned bridges! If I have burned a bridge between you and me, dear reader, please let me know; I promise it wasn't intentional! And I'd like to re-build it.
Here are some examples from the last year where I ran into someone I never thought I'd see again (but was delighted I did!):
1. Living in the Bay Area, a girl who I had accompanied at BYU (very talented and ummm...very aware of her talent) came to my ward because her father was the high councilman in our ward and she was visiting home for Christmas.
2. Walking into practice yesterday for the Elementary School Fine Arts Choir, the flautist for one of our performances was a girl Brandon and I had worked with the summer we dated. Yay!
3. A friend I haven't seen in years (since 6th grade?) found me on Facebook last week. This week? Crazy!
4. My former roommate (from fall of 1998) was walking in front of my house last week while I was unloading the recent Costco run into the house. No joke! We stopped and chatted for a while --we haven't seen each other for about 4 years.

See? See? You never know when a blast from the past will come waltzing by and I promise you that it will be much nicer if you had parted ways in kindness. Ooh! That reminds me! Once, I ran into a boy I had dated when I was 16 years old. I was 22 at the time I saw him again and very pregnant with #1. We ran into each other on campus at BYU, and although I remember being a jerk to the poor guy (I hadn't spoken to him in almost 5 years), he still greeted me warmly. That was nice to know that he held no hard feelings. Perhaps it was because he had just gotten married himself? Yeah, there's nothing like marriage to forgive past loves of wrongdoing...

So, what's going on in your life right now? Have you ever burned any bridges? Run into the past and flipped out because it took you by surprise?

8 comments:

Desi said...

Why couldn't you have told me about the burning bridges thing years ago?

Yes, I think I have burned my share of bridges and yes the past has very recently come and smacked me in the face. It is a very long story and I even have a whole new bog concerning it but long story short...life works in crazy and mysterious ways?

Mother of the Wild Boys said...

When you've made huge life-changes, such as the ones I made once becoming converted to the gospel, it's nearly impossible to not burn a few bridges.

So yeah, I've got the ashes of some bridges on my conscience.....

Cristy said...

I've burned a few, and one I particularly feel bad about. I know exactly what I would do though if I ever saw that person again, and actually hope to so I can rectify what happened. Thanks for reminding me! (No really)

Rochelleht said...

That never happens when you live in Texas. Unless you grew up in Texas. Which, as you know, I did not.

Julie said...

I was happy to have that friend find me too.

flip flop mama said...

I ran into a girl I went to Kindergarten with yesterday. She recognized me and it took a bit for me to recognize her but it was so fun to reconnect! That was 25 years ago...crazy.

Michelle Walker said...

I've taken a blow torch to some very important bridges. I've burned bridges to my sister, my mother and my father...luckily, they have all been reconstructed. I have burned bridges with my sisters in law and my mother in law, which I am now trying to rebuild. It's painful. It's a Christ-like attribute to leave your bridges intact--even if at the end of the day it ends up being a bridge that leads to nowhere.

certainly not "Liz" said...

Cheryl, maybe this "Liz" person is insane, too. Maybe that's why she doesn't run. Insane is cool, right?