I am one of those people who don't get "offended" by what people say at church. I profess to be more concerned with my own salvation then running into someone who has offended me at church. But now I'm starting to understand why people want to leave --at least for a while.
Okay, it's really quite stupid, but today I called a new teacher to talk about "new teacher" stuff. She'll be with our Sunbeams (3 yr olds) and we're still trying to get her a co-teacher (there are 11 Sunbeams!). At first I thought the conversation was going okay --but soon realized that it was NOT.
Long story short (don't need to get into the messy details here), she hung up on me. What made it worse, is I was about say, with great sincerity "What would you like me to do to help you better?" I got to the "would" and she said she was too busy, and hung up on me.
I balled for an hour.
It wouldn't have been so bad if it wasn't for the following:
She spoke to me like a child (she is old enough to be my mother --maybe older), she refused to budge on her position, she basically accused me of not wanting to help her, DH has been gone for 3 days, I'm 2 weeks from delivering, I'm stressed to the max with Primary and planning my 10 yr. reunion, and I've been pretty exhausted this week without DH to help. So I called my secretary, balled to her and asked her what I should do. She was awesome and helped me see the teacher's side --which, in all fairness, the teacher really did have some valid points; she was just so rude about it all --and told me to just forget about it and apologize to the teacher tomorrow. Even though she doesn't deserve it. ~sigh~ Anyways, she was a great comfort. Of course, DH came home RIGHT as I'm balling to my secretary, which could not have been better (or worse) timing. He saw me all emotional, but he immediately listened and sent me to bed for 2 1/2 hours while he took care of the kids.
Man, I love my husband.
Anyways, I keep thinking I'll be okay, but everytime I think of the conversation, I tear up again. I'm determined NOT to stay home from Church, just because I'm all emotional, but what if I start crying in front of this teacher tomorrow in Primary? What if she apologizes first? What if I don't have the guts to apologize? I swear, I'm just an emotional wreck. I know nothing will be solved if I ignore it, so I know I'll do my best to right this whole mess, but I'm just so tired, you know? I'll be ready for some time away from my responsibilities --even if it is just to enter MORE by taking care of my baby. I think I need to be away from people for a while...and what better excuse than a baby born in the winter? "Oh, I'm sorry, he might get RSV. I don't want to talk to you or see you for 2 months..."