Wednesday, March 31, 2010

The Biggest Loser: Change is Hard

I gained .3 pounds. And I know why, too.

I ate too many processed things and over-ate a tad at a barbecue on Saturday. But I don't feel too bad because my eating habits have still improved. Drastically. Not slightly. Improved drastically. And that, dear reader, has made all the difference in the world!

Thoughts on the Show:
I can't stand Melissa. I was so upset she made it back on the show. Victoria making it, though? Awesome. AWESOME!
I was also very, very sad to see Stephanie go. I liked her so much.

Thoughts on Weight Loss:
I really like what Jillian and Bob say on the show about stress. Stress causes so many problems, and it can really inhibit weight loss. Why? Because stress makes the body go into panic-mode, thereby making it save everything it can to survive. I honestly think part of my success now (besides eating so much better) is letting go of the stress around me.

Did you know, that besides my church service (which is invaluable to me), my only responsibility is to be a mother and wife? Yeah, those are heavy, heavy, and exhausting responsibilities, but! They are my choice. And my happiness. Realizing that I can now put every effort into being a great mom and wife (rather than trying to gain approval for external desires) has lifted such a burden from my shoulders. I'm so sad it's taken me over 9 years to figure this out.

In Sunday School, we were learning about how we can alter our way of thinking to avoid becoming angry with our spouse or family members. It made me think of the story that I try to share often, because of it's profound affect on me (and is relevant to this blog post, I promise):

I wanted Brandon to eat family dinner with us each night at 6PM. I knew he could be home at 6PM and I wanted to eat then. Eating together was my goal. But every night, Brandon would come home at 6:10PM. Or 6:30PM. He never came home by 6PM! If he did, it was rare. This made me so angry! Why couldn't he see how important it was for us to eat together? Why was he being so selfish? I talked to him about it. I demanded it. I was firm. But nothing changed. Just more apologies and more missed dinners.
And then one day, I had a profound thought (that came from the Holy Ghost, I have no doubt): Why don't we eat dinner at 7PM?
It completely changed everything.
Why not, indeed? My goal was to eat as a family, right? We can just as easily do this at 7PM as we can at 6PM. I can give the kids a snack at 5PM if I have too. Why not?
So I changed it. And from then on, we ate together as a family. Without anger, without resentment, without late-ness.
Sure, people could say that Brandon was being selfish in not changing. But they could just as easily say the same thing about me. It wasn't about him or me --it was about the goal to eat together. And by compromising my idea of what had to happen, it worked.

That's how it can be with your weight-loss journey. Sure, it's easy to say that you can't change. That you won't, don't know how, that it's impossible. But you would be wrong. Because you just need to think outside the box. Think of your eating habits and exercise habits and food in general in a new way. What can you change? How can you change? What do you have to do to make it work?

It's possible. I promise.


Desi said...

I can't stand Melissa either...I was not happy when she got back on...

Cristy said...

I did the same thing with Jim about our family dinner (only took me 7 years to figure out I had to be the one to change...) Thanks for always being so open!

tamrobot said...

hey! you've motivated me to try to lose the 10 pounds i've gained the past year or 2. I started keeping track last week and I have lost 2 pounds in 7 days! If I'm hungry I try to eat a salad or fruit instead of a bazillion pieces of toast or cookies. Also been working on eating more organic and eating smaller meals more often, which helps like crazy.

Stephanie said...

I really liked your story about dinner time. It puts a GREAT perspective on what's important.

Emily & Co. said...

So...what do you do at church?

Love the family dinner story. I gave up on it a long time ago - my hubby's schedule is too erratic. Our solution? We all get up early for family breakfast and scripture study before school.

Have you read "The Seven Habits of Effective Families"? It talks a lot about the time between stimulus and response, and how to create a "pause" before we respond to the stimulus in our environment...which enables you to "alter your thinking to avoid becoming angry...".

Amanda D said...

Great post, Cheryl. Change is hard, but it is possible.

I was so irritated that Melissa got back on too. She is evil.

FluffyChicky said...

Change is a hard thing for me...mostly because I am stubborn and I hate to have to admit that I am the one who needs to change. :) You are an awesome example of what I should be.

evitafjord said...

189.6, minus 3. sounds good on paper, but I'm a bit afraid I'm just losing the muscle I gained running in the beginning. I have got to make myself get back out there this weekend, but the weather (in the 80s already) and the pollen make me want to just hide inside instead.

Becky, I have 2 cats said...

I had a crap couple of weeks for eating. I temporarily took a third job which was really more of a labor of love to help a friend. Sooooooo, I'm up. Back to over where I started by 3 pounds. Yup, 162. But I'm still running. I can do at least 4 miles without stopping consistently. Bleh. Gotta get through to farmer's market time!