Speaking of babies and midwives (do I sound like a broken record, yet?), I ran into a former midwife at the store yesterday.
She delivered #3. His was the most exhilarating birth I've had and full of contradictions. He was my first unmedicated childbirth (by choice), and my first with a midwife. He was my biggest baby (9 lbs 11 oz), and he was fairly hard to push out. However, his birth, out of all of 'em, is still #1 for "best labor and delivery experience."
And I owe most of it to this midwife!
I saw her, and I said, "Are you Betty?" She smiled, immediately knew what I was going to say, and replied, "Yes."
"You won't remember me," I said, "but you delivered that boy over there." I pointed to #3 who will be turning FIVE in August (holy cow, I think I just about died when thinking about that).
We then talked a bit, and she said she was happy to see I was having another, etc. Then I asked her..."why did you leave?" (meaning the clinic I go to).
She frowned, and I heard the story.
Apparently, the "office" decided that four midwives were one too many, and they were losing money. They took a survey (well, they told Betty they took a survey) and it turns out she was the least liked, and so she was forced to quit. As we talked, I learned that she was getting paid more than the others because of her seniority (she delivered over 600 babies!), and she feels they unfairly forced her to leave because of that alone. Because of this --and being less than 5 years (or so) from retirement --she hasn't been able to work in a clinic ever since. She teaches nursing classes at a college and some hypnobirthing courses, instead of delivering babies.
I told her I was so sad for her, and frankly, I was quite upset. I informed her that I hadn't seen any kind of a "survey", and if I had, I would have loved the chance to rave about her! She was, by far, my favorite. In fact, when I think about it, I'm pretty sure she was everyone's favorite!
I'm not kidding, dear reader --this woman is a genius. A birthing genius. She blew my husband away with her knowledge, professionalism, and skill, and my husband, dear reader, has high standards. For example, when my #3, who was facing my thigh as he was being pushed out, ended up having the cord wrapped around his neck twice, my midwife (as she was working with me to push him out) took the time to look my husband in the eye and say, "Brandon, I have to get him out; I need to make sure he can breathe. Are you okay with me cutting the cord?"
Who says that? Who respects the father (and the mother) enough to ask a question like that? Of COURSE we want the baby to be safe.
But it gets better! The woman stayed with me my entire labor. She was patient and kind, and she didn't rush right out after cleaning me up. She was thoughtful, thorough, and in complete control of the environment --the environment she made sure was the exact one I wanted. Of course, it might have helped that she had complete empathy for pregnant women --she had 11 of her own children and is a grandmother. Her kindness shone through because of her past experiences, I'm sure of it!
Well, we parted ways, and she told me my words made her entire day and was happy to know that maybe it wasn't the patients who had disliked her (holy cow, I was near tears, dear reader), and I was so upset. I mean, I know there is some bitterness still there on her part (it's been less than 18 months; how could there not be?!), but I was already upset with one of the midwives at my clinic. Now to know they let her go over money?
But get this: after Betty left, another midwife left for another clinic. So, they only had two midwives. And then just recently they hired a new midwife (the one I really like).
So, my question is, why didn't they hire Betty back?? Makes me think this money-and-she's-the-favorite theory isn't so far off...Of course, I only see this one perspective; I only know a tiny bit about it. I could be completely wrong. However, it has reaffirmed the fears I felt about my clinic, and things are falling into place and clicking...
Oh, well. I honestly don't want to change clinics at this point (especially with them knowing all of my history and my birth plan and everything), and I really do love giving birth at the hospital near their office. But I think I may request that new midwife, now...maybe I could convince this little guy to show up on her on-call day? Maybe? Hmmm....
Have you ever had a doctor or midwife or pediatrician, etc. who you just loved?