Wednesday, May 30, 2007

DH knows me all too well...

DH is a patient man.

He emailed me about a month ago with this information. In the email he said "not implying anything!" which was a smart thing to do at the time. But, of course, I needed it. I'm thinking I might call today.

I find that the feeling of hopelessness is making it hard to make friends with other mothers. Especially the other mothers of #1's friends at school that are not LDS. I'm sure they all think I'm either stuck-up or very shy. I wish they knew what I was really like; but they don't see my sparkling and witty personality when I'm dropping #1 off at school everyday. Of course, DH rarely sees that witty and sparkling personality anymore. It's still there, under the surface, and every once in a while, she shows herself. It's just not as often as we'd like.

So, to all those moms that think I'm not interested: You'd be surprised how greatly I would love having you for a friend. And I'm sorry that I'm not myself. Please don't think that I don't want to be a part of your circle. I just don't know how to get past the wall, yet. I'm getting there, though...

2 comments:

Jamie J said...

Hey Cheryl, I hope that you can get the help you need to feel "normal" again. Feel free to email me if you ever need someone to talk to. I've been kind of up and down lately too, but not quite sure if what I'm experiencing is actually depression or not. It's a hard road, but be strong and don't forget who the real you is. You'll find her again...

Cheryl said...

Jamie-
Thank you so much! Your emails and comments already help. :)