Resolutions? Starting in July sounds good...

I'm starting to understand the beauty of a New Year's Resolution. Not so much in keeping them, but in the fresh feeling of a clean slate --the desire to start anew. The date itself makes sense, but even more so when the Christmas Chaos is finished. There are no immediate holidays on the horizon. There are no crazy vacations to schedule (usually). School resumes with little fanfare, and we go back to our routines with little decorations to show for it.

It's good. It feels good. It's like when you organize all the cupboards in your kitchen and can let out a sigh of contentment, because, for those few moments (and hopefully days!) you know exactly what you have, where it goes, and what you are to do with it.

New Year's Resolutions are like that. You know what you have (a broken person --in my case --yearning to be fixed on all sides). You know where it goes (a fixable state). You know what you are to do with it (Fix, fix, fix!). There's time to think about it and the desire is usually extremely strong.

Now, let's set aside that only a quarter of all NYR's make their way to the goal line, because that talk is just negative. To be completely honest, I usually make my new goals around Summertime. Weight Loss? I did that in July. Becoming a Writer? I did that in September. Learn to like Laundry? Yeah, like that'll ever happen. But can you see my pattern? Resolving to accomplish goals late in the year have yielded me much success.

However (boy, there are a lot of "howevers" in my posts --have you noticed?), this time I think I need to set some NYR's for myself. So, in the spirit of the Holiday, I present these goals of mine for your judging eyes (and for future taunting, if I do not follow through!):

• I will keep writing (that's an obvious one, eh?)
• I will continue to lose weight
• I will not get discouraged by publisher's rejection letters
• I will open my scriptures up daily (notice I didn't say how much or how long I would read!)
• I will devote more time to my household responsibilities
• I will strive to be a better wife and mother

Not so bad, eh? There's nothing wrong with creating NYR's that one can keep...

What are YOUR NYR's?

P.S. I'll give you all the crazy Christmas details tomorrow. Believe you me, you'll want to stay tuned!

The Christmas Carnage...

...will be written about next week. There is still too much going on! I will get to it as soon as I can, though. And I'll add some pictures. :)

For now, here is a link to my SIL's post that talks about #2 and some of the funny things she said this week. I know you all love those #2-isms!

"For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The Mighty God, The Everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace."

Isaiah 9:6

Merry Christmas!

Miracles present themselves in many ways...

Attending the preschool Christmas party yesterday morning was a success. Brandon, who is in Las Vegas for the BYU bowl game right now, took the camera with him (ahhh!), but good friends snapped some photos of #2 with the very fake-looking Santa.

All Neighbor Gifts are delivered! After lunch (still yesterday), the children were the "runners" as we drove all over town delivering gifts to each worthy household. What made them "worthy"? Mostly just some connection we have with them other than knowing who they are --I wish I could give gifts to every single person we know, but it's just impossible. Maybe one day it might be a possibility...

I hired a sitter for the boys last night, and it was GNO! (girl's night out) #1, #2 and I had several errands to run, and I promised them dinner at a "Restwant". We had to go to #1's gymnastics class first and this is where the night of miracles began:

• Finding out that the next session of gymnastics had already been paid for?! How did that happen?
• Finding a UPS store on our way to somewhere else!
• Enjoying a great dinner at Mimi's and having the BEST waitress --EVER! She was sweet, non-invasive, great with the kids --and on our way out, she brought them refills of their drinks in brand new little cups. How sweet is that?!
• Finding the LDS bookstore to be on our way to Target (in the proximity to Mimi's) and getting a lot of what we needed in that one stop.
• Going into the zoo-like parking lot at Target and arriving just in time to get an amazing parking spot.
• Finding almost everything we needed at Target, including stocking stuffers for moi.
• Resolving that I will have to shop again the next day, but then seeing the store I needed the most still open and finding exactly what I needed and it was on sale!!
• Coming home to find the house fairly clean, the boys very happy, and children going to sleep pretty quickly after an exhausting day.

As a mother, you cannot buy days like this. I am so very grateful! The biggest miracle of all? Doing it on my own, while Brandon was driving to Nevada. Usually, when he leaves, something terrible happens (flooding, flat tires, infestations, ER visits). So far, so good! Wait --he doesn't come home until tomorrow. Ahh! I better go knock on some wood...

Last Thoughts:

Here is a healthy dose of reality: My childhood friend received a double-lung transplant just in time for Christmas. She has waited her entire life to breathe a clean, unlabored breath. And now she can. That is truly a miracle! (make sure you scroll down to read about all the updates on her progress.)

Rantings and Ravings...and some good stuff, too...

Here I am. Procrastinating. Again.

So, in the spirit of throwing aside what it is I really need to get done, here are some things I've been thinking about lately:

• I am so tired of the crap (yep, I said crap) that is going around about Mormons because of the Mitt Romney campaign. I'm tired of the bigots, and I'm grateful for those who give out good information. If anyone wants to know what a Mormon believes, go ask one. Don't wait for a political candidate to spell it out for you. Oh, and if you cared to know, I want Mitt to win, and it has very little to do with his religion...
• And, of course, I need to be nice to the bigots. Gosh, darn it! :) (thank you, m&m!)
• The Twilight movie is coming out next December! I can't wait!
• I have two family birthdays and 3 family anniversaries to think about/celebrate in the next week!! Whose idea was it to do these things around Christmas, huh?!
• All of my awesome blogging friends who leave me comments: I just wanted to say THANK YOU. You make my day. My week/month/year/life. Honestly, your comments mean so much to me and I thank each and every one of you for continuing to leave me great feedback. If I ignore your comment --it's not on purpose! Please know that your words mean a lot to me...that is all. :)

Back to the Christmas grind!

Go Read...

...THIS. It's just beautiful!

Recovery Day

Yesterday's Daily Grind Episode didn't finish at 1PM, I'm afraid. There was more pain and sorrow and a lot of self-pity and Lifetime original movie-watching. However, the sun is shining on me today, even though, realistically, it's pouring rain outside. But whatever. Today is another Recovery Day.

Within the course of the morning I:
-Went to aerobics/weight training class for an hour (at our church).
-Did the dishes
-Showered
-Swept, mopped, vacuumed, picked up, organized, killed some ants, cleaned a bathroom
-took out trash and recyclables
-dressed the kids, fed the kids, played with the kids
-wrapped some presents, made some presents
-shut the door to my bedroom so I could pretend that the whole house was clean

And I am Happy. Not thrilled, I mean, I still have 4 piano lessons to teach, presents to wrap, gifts to buy, school party stuff to get, babysitters to find, etc. etc. but I'm passed the "Wo is me" stage. For now.

See, I go through this pattern (which is not quite unlike the female cycle) of Down Days and Recovery Days. I have found (and have written about it in the past) that the more responsibility I have, the more Happier Days I have. Well --at least the More Responsible Days appear more often. So, it's good to stay busy. But at the same time, when life gets too chaotic, I have more Down Days, too. I crash and burn, so to speak. That's where balance comes in. And I probably didn't mention that I'm not very good at balance, did I? :)

Nah, I mean, I know about balance and taking time for me, but man, without moderation, the whole thing falls apart. I mean, honestly? If I take out too much time for me, I turn into this selfish person who wants more of it. But if I never take out time for myself, I turn into a resentful person ready to gripe at anything who will listen. Therefore, if I need to have a good balance of Down Days (about 2 a month) and Recovery Days (about...well, 2 a month), then so be it. As long as I can find that balance between the two, I think I'll be okay...

P.S. Christmas is one week away!! YAY!

The Daily Grind

One poopy diaper.
Four Bagel Bites pizzas, face-down, on the floor.
Two naked "Help-me-mommy-I-went-potty!" episodes.
Two grounded-from-the-TV-and-computer daughters refusing to clean up anything.
One shoe missing.
Two quiche pies made for the teacher's luncheon.
Three tantrums.
One hungry baby.
One back-handed compliment by a preschool teacher.
One load of dishes not started this morning.
Two loads of laundry left-over in the machines from Saturday.
One Hundred Bazillion ants in...
...Two bathrooms.

All before 1PM.

And people always wonder why I'm in a bad mood. I guess I need some perspective. So:

Four healthy children.
One hard-working husband.
One strong house.
Twenty-Seven pounds lost.
One nice-working Internet connection.
Six growing testimonies.
Several Thousand beautiful songs.
Two amazing parents.
One quiet moment to blog.

"A Picture Journal" OR "Why I haven't been blogging lately"

The kids got haircuts. I cut the girls' hair. Brandon cut the boys' hair.

#1 had a gymnastics recital

Ward Party was fun --Our gingerbread house was entered into the contest. Had we known the long and great tradition of our ward's gingerbread house contest, I'm sure we would have entered something more worthy. :)

Santa came! #1 and #2 were excited. #3? Not so much.

We woke up slowly this morning --the kids wanted to make "cinamum toast". This is what I saw when I walked into the kitchen. They did a good job! I only had to take about 3 TB of butter off of #3's toast. :)

My New Year's Goal Starts NOW!

Update:

Brandon didn't lose any weight this week. But he didn't gain any weight, either!
Me? I lost 2 pounds!! Wa-hoo! I'm right back to where I was the week before Thanksgiving. And I'm feeling more motivation.

Here's the plan:

I will lose 10 pounds by the end of January. I only need 10 pounds to make goal weight.

Whew! I feel pressure now that I've finally said it (wrote it?) out loud. But why can't I do it? I mean, seriously? Why not? What is stopping me from staying on task, exercising, and being strong through the holidays? Do I really need to eat all the yummy food? Honestly, what in the world would I be missing if I refused to eat things that could derail my efforts? What is so great about it that it is more important than my health?

Yeah, okay, it tastes good. But not nearly as good as sweet victory!

(Yeah, that's cheesy, but I couldn't help it! :) )

P.S. Next week I'll post some before and after photos of us!

Do I have to teach them...everyday...?

We're supposed to teach them life skills that will help them for the rest of their...well...(wait for it)...lives. We're supposed to teach them how to manage money, clean the house, do laundry, dishes, windows, weeding, paying tithing, do their homework, write thank you cards, give presents, eat politely, speak politely, etc. and that is just the beginning (or the middle, depending on how old your child is).

We're supposed to do this. So why is it so much easier just to do it for them?

See, today I was done. Finished. Again. (Tends to happen every 3 weeks). Instead of getting them off of the computer to help me clean the house (in a fury of frustration), I sent them outside. I gave them coats and shoes and even provided a snack. Baby was napping; children were playing. I cleaned the house. Not all of it, mind you, but most of it. I got rid of more ants. I took laundry out of the dryer. I did dishes. I vacuumed. I picked up toys, papers, crayons, books, homework, Go-gurt garbage, granola bar wrappers, cheerios stuck to the floor, and cat food. And now the house is nice (okay, the bottom half is nice). I lit a candle. It smells like Christmas.

Now, if I'm supposed to teach my children to clean and work, how did I do that by shooing them outside to play? How do I do that by picking up their junk? Their annoying junk?

Trying to find the compromise between childhood and responsibility is very hard. Some days, I help them clean, we do it together, we are happy. Other days, I'm a raging lunatic, yelling at them to "clean it up or you don't get TV for a week!" And then there are days like today, where I send them away and happily do it myself.

Where do you find the compromise? How do you manage the teaching of life skills?[ Okay, mostly just cleaning skills (street smarts and being polite we'll save for another post).]

Guest Post by the Hubby...

To my future son-in-law:
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
I don't think you ever had a chance.
I love my daughter, #2, but she is one heck of a negotiator. And, guess what? You're going to lose every time. She is now only four and a half. We just got home from tithing settlement with our bishop. The bishop had candy on his desk for visiting children. Here is a summary of the conversation:
#2: "Oooh... Mom, can I have more than one?"
Mom: "No. Just one."
#2: (to the bishop) Can't I have more than one?
Bishop (looking to mom for approval). Sure. You can have two.
#2: (to bishop, realizing he gave in WAY to easy) Can I have three?
Bishop (looking at Mom who is shaking her head): Uh... no. Two.
#2 browses through the various pieces of candy, and picks out a tootsie roll, a Jolly Rancher, and a Laffy Taffy.
#2: (to everybody) Hmmm... I just can't decide. Can I have three?
Mom, Dad, & Bishop (in unison): No.
#2: But I can't decide! Can't I have three?
Dad: No, #2. You can have two. Pick them.
#2: Hmmmmmm. (Taking a long time, hoping that conversation will resume and everybody will forget that she has three pieces of candy in her hand.)
Dad: #2! Either you pick two before I count to three, or you will get ZERO. One... Two...
#2 puts all three down back in the pile and says "Hmmm.. I really can't decide." [She's now stalling until she can come up with a new tactic.]
#2 (after a few seconds): Can I eat one now, and then take two?
Mom & Dad: "No!".
Bishop is laughing now.
#2 (staring at a large stack of candy): "Can I take two, and then come back later and have more?"
Mom & Dad are trying really hard not to laugh.
Bishop: "Yes! You can come back to my office next Sunday and have some more candy."
#2 thinking... "Can I eat one now, and then take two?" (Obviously hoping we forgot this tactic.)
Mom & Dad: "No!"
#2: "Okay, I'll have two then and come back on Sunday."

She's four years old! I think I need to get her into sales soon. So... sorry dude. She's going to look at you with her pretty blue eyes, and she's going to smile and show her dimple. If she's like her mom, she's going to have a smokin' hot figure. By this time, you're already going to want to make her happy... and it will be too late. She will have you right where she wants you. Wrapped around her pretty little finger.
-DH

Piano Hands

It finally happened.
I knew it would, too. It was just a matter of time --and believe you me? Time is the operative word here.
As I was teaching one of my piano students today, I demonstrated how she needed to play the E with her thumb and cross over the #2 finger to play the D (fellow pianists should understand what the heck I just said). As I did this, I saw my piano teacher's hand as clearly as if I was 8 years old again and she was demonstrating something to me. I even smelled her perfume in my mind. It happened quickly, but it was such a sudden and specific memory that I lost my train of thought for a few moments and thought the following:

• I loved my piano teacher. She was wonderful, but had a hard life. I hope she is happy right now.
• Here I am, 20 years later, doing exactly what she had done. Helping children find their talents and patiently teaching them how to bring music to life with tiny, tiny hands. Did I ever wonder or hope to be a piano teacher? I can't remember.
• When did my hands start to look so...old?!

=================================================

UPDATE:

Okay, so the weight loss updates haven't been very good. I have my excuse. But I can't let it stop me from being honest...so...over Thanksgiving, I gained 3 pounds. Yep. And last night I lost... only .4. Not even a half a pound! ~sigh~ Brandon's doing great, though. He did gain one pound over Thanksgiving, but he made up for it this last week. He's down THIRTY-FIVE POUNDS! I'm not quite to my original 27! But that's okay. I'm just going to work harder this week. But one more positive note:

I bought a pair of size 14 jeans on Monday. I have not worn a size 14 for years! But, not only did they fit, they were a little loose! I'm wearing them right now and wowzers, it feels great. :)

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If you don't get a Christmas letter and card from us for a while, I apologize. I'm taking longer getting this stuff done than I usually do! Too much blogging, I tell ya'... :)

Christmas Meme

I got this from Jamie and Amanda.

1.Wrapping paper or gift bags? Mostly wrapping paper, but gift bags sure are easier.
2. Real tree or artificial? Artificial all the way...
3. When do you put up the tree? Right after Thanksgiving!
4. When do you take the tree down? Between Christmas and New Years, usually.
5. Which do you prefer: Hot chocolate or Apple Cider? Hot Chocolate. And Cider. But only if I yell "Wassail! Wassail! Wassail!" before I drink it (those that sang with me in high school choir for ISU's Renaissance Dinner will totally get that).
6. Favorite gift received as a child? The Heavenly Kid (remember those? Generic Cabbage Patch Dolls) that had brown hair like me. I must have been around 6 or 7.
7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes --I have 3, but hope to collect more!
8. Hardest person to buy for? Brandon
9. Easiest person to buy for? All my kids
10. Worst Christmas gift ever received? I can't think of any. I must have blocked it out. Hooray for repression!
11. Mail or email Christmas card? Mail. I always do snail mail because I think it shows class and a little effort (no offense to those who choose to email!).
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? White Christmas (ah, the nostalgia!); The Christmas Story; The Nativity one that the Church sent out in the Ensign magazines years ago.
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? December. I thrive under pressure!
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? Once again, I don't remember.
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Usually it's anything with chocolate and eggnog, but this year, I'm not sure I can allow myself too much!
16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? Clear
17. Favorite Christmas song? Cannot possibly choose one. Can-not.
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? We started staying home two years ago, and I love it! This year we're staying home again and it'll be nice not having to haul gifts back and forth.
19. Can you name Santa's reindeer? Yep! "You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen; Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen. But do you recall....blah...Rudolph!"
20. Do you have an Angel on top or a star? A star.

Tag-- You're it! (That includes you!)

They just keep growing...

My Baby Boy (#3) has grown up so much these last few years. When #4 turned 9 months old last month, I went back to see what #3 looked like around that age. Isn't he so cute? Yeah, not much has changed. He's still adorable.

So, for fun, I went back to see pictures of the girls. But I don't have any of their baby pictures online. And I was too lazy to scan their baby pictures --instead, here's one of them a couple of years ago.

And for more fun, I added what #4 looked like at birth and then now.

They grow up fast, don't they?